I crash my car (backwards nogal) through a garden wall. I am not injured. I reek of alcohol and my words are slurred. I refuse to get out of my car (because I am hardly able to stand). A crowd gathers including the owner of the house. They all agree that I am so intoxicated that the police should be called. I curse and swear at them. They tape my slurred ranting and raving with their cell phones. Photographs and videos are taken clearly displaying my glazed and swimming eyes, and recording my drunken and incoherent rantings.
Two female officers arrive and request that I get out the car in order to breathalyse and if necessary, arrest me. I swear at them and say that I refuse to be arrested by “females”. I become violent and lurch around outside of the car. The officers call for backup. I still refuse to be breathalysed. I write my name and other details on a scrap of paper making numerous mistakes. I am eventually arrested, a blood sample is taken and the results reveal that I am almost four times over the limit.
I appear in court and plead INNOCENT. The State presents all of the facts above, but my defence attacks each and every shred of evidence and all of the witnesses called. What a nerve !!
And do you know what? I am a High Court Judge, and my name is Nkola Motata, and I’ll probably just get a rap over the knuckles. What a good example for the rest of us. No wonder crime is out of control in this country.
Go to this website and download the audio clips for a good laugh, and “judge” for yourself.